Vampire Kisses One-Shot
by ImmortalLover1390
Summary: Raven and Alexander have a night to themselves until they get a surprise visitor, something happens and everybody is uneasy. What's worse? Oh yea, Raven ends up pushing Alexander too far. What will happen? Who'll get caught up in the drama? Read to find out. (A/N If anybody comes up with a title let me know XD) Read and Review. ****Rated T/M****
1. Chapter 1

Tonight, Alexander and I decided that we were going to stay inside the mansion. We're going to watch "Let the Right One in", so Alexander went to get the snacks. I was reclined on the couch with my feet up on the headrest waiting for him. I closed my eyes to just listen to the creaking of the old house as Alexander and Jameson moved about. I heard footsteps coming toward the entertainment room and open my eyes to see Alexander and Sebastian come in. "Raven, look who's come to-" They both stopped and stared at me.

"What?" I asked confused. Quickly Sebastian's face turned pink and he looked away. Alexander's eyes turned red but his cheeks were also turning pink. Ok, I know I officially qualify in the 'Hot' department where Goths are concerned, but come on! They act like they never seen me before. I had my usual beat-up combat boots, black spider-web knee-high stockings, my 'Emily the Strange' tank top, and black/red pleated mini-skirt… Oooooooh!

Quickly, I sat up and fixed my skirt to properly cover my bottom. Now I'm sure my face was a bright shade of red. "Sorry… I didn't realize," I explained. I looked away from them and crossed my legs feeling suddenly exposed. Alexander came and sat down next to me, but I was too embarrassed to look at him. How could I? I just flashed his best friend my goods in front of him!

I heard Sebastian clear his throat as he still stood in the doorway. "I um… should go. I just thonged by… STOPPED BY… to say 'hey' so… yeah. I'll… uh…" Then you could hear his footsteps rushing away and the sound of the stairs creaking, and finally the sound of the front door closing. There was an awkward silence for a while.

Alexander and I just sat there and I was feeling a little stupid. Usually I wore my bicycle shorts under my skirts, but we weren't going out so I didn't put them on. I also didn't think about my racy panties when I had my feet up, I just wanted to relax. If it was just Alexander, maybe it would have started something hot and heavy, but it wasn't. "I'm really sorry, about Sebastian seeing my…"

"Don't worry about it," Alexander assured me. "Next time I'll give you a heads-up if he thongs by again." Then we both started laughing and the tension eased up. "So does that mean, you're not sorry about me seeing?" Alexander asked. I thought about it before answering.

"You're my boyfriend and I love you. You're allowed to see whatever you want." I looked at Alexander finally and saw he was analyzing what I said. He didn't respond, and I started to feel self-conscious. Then Alexander got up to put in the movie and bring over the tray of snacks. When the DVD started, he turned out the light and came back over to sit next to me.

After a while of watching the previews, Alexander spoke. "What if I wanted to see more?" My breath hitched and couldn't stop the slow start of a smile. I felt Alexander wrap his arms around me and pull me closer. I snuggled up to him.

"Then it's your move." As soon as the words left my mouth I felt anxious and excited over what he might do. The movie started to play but Alexander brought my face to look up at him as he leaned down to kiss me. Our lips pressed together and he tightened his hold a little. Then we kissed again but it was lighter. He trailed his lips to deliver feather light kisses at the corner of my mouth, my jaw, my neck, and my earlobe. I felt his fangs lightly nipping at my skin before he came back to my lips. I parted them and he took the advantage. Our tongues intertwined and we moaned into the kiss. My hands were caressing his chest and the back of his neck. Alexander started moving his hands, rubbing my arms, then my sides. On one hand, his thumb was caressing the side of my right boob, but the other hand was moving downward. When he reached the hem of my skirt, he didn't hesitate to slowly pull it up. My heart beat faster and I was sure he could hear it. His cool hand was tracing the side of my thigh as he brought my skirt up to my hip. I pulled from the kiss and the look on his face looked like he was rethinking what he was doing. But I didn't want him to stop. So I sat up, making my skirt fall back in place, and straddled him with my knees bent on the sides of his hips. Alexander put both hands on my waist and I grabbed them to put them back under my skirt. Immediately he began rubbing my upper thighs before rounding to my backside. I pulled my skirt up all the way and unzipped it before pulling it over my head. Alexander sucked in a breath. I spread my thighs further apart to bring myself closer to him.

"Raven I think we should stop," he said all of a sudden. I froze and looked at him surprised. "If you do anymore I won't be able to control myself," he explained.

"Who says you have to control yourself?" I asked him innocently. "I'm all yours for the taking Alexander. If you don't want to go all the way, we don't have to." He leaned back into the sofa cushion and exhaled. "That doesn't mean you can't look… or touch," then I kissed his lips moving mine slowly over his, "or taste." Alexander pulled me tightly against him and kissed me with primal passion. I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him with abandon. He groped and kneaded my arse cheeks. We both moaned and I started to undulate my hips against the bulge in his pants. Alexander pulled out from under me quick, breaking the kiss, and stood up. His erection was very defined in his skinny jeans and I smirk over having been able to provoke it out of him. "Need help taking them off?" I asked suggestively.

"Raven, I don't want to hurt you, we're not going to have sex. I can't bare the thought of causing you any kind of pain… no matter how brief." Alexander looked at me seriously.

"So you're never going to have sex with me?" I asked incredulously.

"I didn't say that, I…" he scrubbed a hand over his face and pushed back his hair that fell over his eyes. Finally he said quietly, "I don't know, Raven. I want to, really, really, want to be with you in every way, but not if you get hurt in the process." He explained.

Was he kidding? "Alexander, it's going to hurt regardless, and I'm not going to be a virgin forever!" I felt hurt and rejected. Alexander was still shaking his head and pacing the floor. I wanted him to come back to me and… "Why don't we just go back to enjoying each other? Remember, looking, touching, and tasting. It doesn't apply to just me. Come be with me Alexander. I want you and I know you want me too. We'll go slow, ease into it." my argument seemed fairly reasonable. He still wasn't looking at me so I stood up and walked over to him but stopped short.

"You should go," was all he said. Without looking at me, Alexander moved past me and out of the room. I was shocked that he just left me like that. I heard his attic room door shut and a tear slipped down my cheek. I turned around and went to turn on the light so I could find my discarded skirt. I looked around and grabbed my overnight bag and left. Too bad I couldn't find my pride. I walked out of the mansion in a trance not fully understanding what went wrong. Grabbing my bike I walked down the driveway and past the gates. Now what? My parents allowed me to stay the night at the mansion, even though I'm already eighteen, but Alexander kicked me out. I didn't want to go back home. Becky was supposed to be at some sleepover the cheerleaders invited her to. Now that she was dating Matt, they were including her in everything so I didn't get to see her much anymore. I pulled out my phone and scrolled down my contact list. "Hey! Sebastian, it's me, Raven."

"Raven, I'm really sorry about earlier, I was just caught off guard. Are we cool?" Sebastian was a good friend to me and best friends with Alexander. I trust him, and maybe he could tell me what's going on with Alexander.

"Yeah, don't worry about it, I'm sorry too. But, um, I was just calling because I need a place to crash for the night and thought you could help me out."

"That's fine with me, but I thought you were staying over Alexander's… was it because of me?"

"No, not really. We had a fight and he told me to leave. I don't want to go home, Becky's with some friends and I feel like crap right now." I started to choke up and felt like I was going to start crying at any moment.

"Hey, don't worry about it. I've got your back, come on over I was just about to order some pizza. But you might want to bring over some Dr. Pepper, I'm all out." I thanked him and hung up before getting on my bike. I rode to the store and picked up the soda. As I stood in line I notice a magazine with a highlight of "What guys secretly fantasize about and how to seduce them." Of course, I grabbed it. After paying for everything and grabbing the bag, I rode off to Sebastian's apartment building.

When I got there he was outside paying for the pizza. I smiled when I saw him wearing a Goth Tweety Bird shirt and Scarface pajama pants. Of course he was barefoot. When the pizza guy drove off, Sebastian noticed me and grinned like he won a prize. "Scarface?" I asked.

"Gotta love the classics, wanna watch?" he asked.

"Sure." I followed him inside the building and headed towards the elevator.

"It's broke, so we gotta take the stairs." My eyes widened.

"But you're on the ninth floor! You do realize I'm still human right?"

"Yeah and so are my neighbors." He retorted. I couldn't help but smirk. "Come on, get your pretty ass up there." Now he laughed and I narrowed my eyes before laughing as well.

"Good thing your building had a bike rack." When we went to the staircase Sebastian offered to carry all my bags and I was grateful. With his vampire strength helping me out, the climb became much more doable. By the time we got to his floor, I was panting and sweating.

**A/N: Please read and review! Pros and Cons XD Also if you've read any of my other stories, I'm sending out an S.O.S. for all readers and writers to help me out of my writers block. I didn't just write this story, it's been on my computer since the 8th book came out which was like... YEARS ago. I just didn't want any fans and followers to be disappointed in my lack of presence. So again, for ANY of my stories if you've got any detailed advice or suggestions to help me out of this writer's block phase, please PM me or leave it in the Reviews. Thanks again for your support.**


	2. Chapter 2

Part Two

"Ahem!" I heard Sebastian fake cough behind me and moved away so he could pass. For some reason, I was blushing over the thought that he was behind me as we climbed the stairs. Considering that he now knows what my 'pretty ass', as he called it, looks like I'm sure it was just the knowledge making me blush. Sebastian walked to his apartment door and I followed with him carrying everything. As soon as he opened the door, I flopped down on the sofa and breathed a sigh of relief into the cushion. I heard him close the door and walk over to the couch. I was sprawled across the seats so I turned to the side so he could sit at the edge.

"Seb?" I decided to confide in him before I broke down. He had all the bags near the coffee table and the pizza and soda on top.

"What's up?" he asked.

"Why is Alexander so…", I couldn't find the right words so I just threw my hands in front of me and made strangling motions.

"So… what? What happened tonight Rae?"

"Well after you left it became a little awkward until we were able to laugh about it. Then Alexander started asking questions about if it was okay for him to see and how far I'd take it." I explained from the beginning without so many details.

"WOW, you guys used my discomfort as entertainment? I'm hurt… no pepperoni for you, human." He joked. I poked his arm with my toe since he was sitting at the end where my feet were and too far for my fingers to reach. He handed me a plate of pizza so I sat up to take it while he continued. "So, what did you say to him?"

"I basically told him he had free reign over my body and it was up to him to make a move. He ignored me at first but then he kissed me and I could feel his hands trying to touch me more so I tried to make it more comfortable for us both but he stopped and said that we shouldn't. I'm an _eighteen-year-old virgin_ with a drop dead gorgeous boyfriend who doesn't want to be intimate with me. He says he wants to but doesn't want to cause any pain for me. Doesn't he know it's gonna hurt only the first time anyways?" At this point I was talking so fast it sounded like I was rambling. When I kept glancing at Sebastian, I'd see he was staring at me wide-eyed but was definitely listening to every word, which encouraged me to continue. "So I tell him that and asked if he plans to _never_ have sex with me, and do you know what he says?" I asked him incredulously. He simply shakes his head with the pizza hovering next to his lips. So in a deeper voice I mocked, " '_I don't know'_ is what he said!" With that I take an angry bite out of my pizza slice.

"So… then what happened?"

I waited until I swallowed my bite before answering. "Then he tells me to leave _after_ I had given him full access and threw off my skirt. Not to mention he had a hard on so he'd be lying if he said he didn't want to. I feel totally rejected Seb, and it hurts so much more coming from him than what I was used to growing up. I'm willing to give him my heart, body, and soul and it seems like the only thing he's willing to take is my heart. But it's not enough for me, and it's so frustrating. You're his best friend you tell me! What is so wrong with being with me? I've never even dated before Alexander and now I feel like I'm going to die never knowing what the hell is wrong with me." After venting my frustrations I stared at my plate and took subconscious bites from my pizza.

"Nothing's wrong with you, Raven. As far as I know you're like a perfect dream made reality." I scoffed at that. "I'm serious! You're not just a gothic beauty; you're hot as hell. You're willing and wanting to be turned into a vampire, which in vampire terms; means everything to us when choosing a human as our mate. You're not one of those materialistic girls. You're a blast to be around and you've got great taste. You've got a big heart despite how many people punched holes in it. You've been a loner, but you don't push people away. Like I said, 'you're perfect'." I stared at Sebastian as he spoke and wondered why he can see me this way but Alexander couldn't.

"Why didn't I meet you first Sebastian?" I said with a sad smile. When I finished my pizza, I leaned into the sofa. Sebastian poured some soda into a glass and handed to me, silently. I took it and drank some while thinking. "So why does Alexander refuse to leap for me then if I'm so perfect? Why fight for me if he won't even touch me?"

Sebastian finished off his second slice and drank some soda while looking far away lost in thought. It felt like an hour passed before he finally spoke. "Back home, there was a human girl that Alexander dated for a while. We were probably fourteen at the time. She was a Roma, gypsy, and never really liked it. She always snuck away to his mansion and he'd take her somewhere secret where they'd be alone. Keep in mind we were young and hormonal. She was a virgin, but he'd lost that title some time before. So when she told him she loved him and wanted him to be her first, he tried to do everything to make it perfect for her. Even made me stay nearby in case the blood that spilled became too much for him to handle. I could hear them. I could hear _her_. It really was the perfect first time… until after. When they… were done, she cried, and he was confused. I came out of hiding because I thought damage control was needed. She slapped him and ran off. The next day, there was a commotion from the gypsies, saying their daughter was raped… apparently, because of their culture, she was engaged at a very young age to a gypsy boy and the families were unhappy with her betrayal. So to save herself, she said he raped her."

I was completely and utterly speechless. There were no words I could say to respond to that. I felt tears trailing down my cheeks. I wasn't even sure how I felt about all this. Sad? Yeah, of course… Angry? How could I not be? Lonely? Somehow that overshadowed everything else. I pulled my legs toward me and wrapped my arms around my folded legs. Sebastian scooted closer and wiped the tears falling from my lashes. "So every time he's with me, he's thinking of someone else? Comparing ME to someone else? Does he think I'll cry wolf if he makes love to me? I'm not a child, I'm not engaged, I'm not a gypsy, and I'm not responsible for someone else's mistakes. How long will he blame me for this, Sebastian? So he's never had sex since then, and plans to live for all eternity without it? From all that I can gather about how Alexander decides to resist me is: he won't make me his eternal mate because the bite will hurt and he wants me to stay human… and he won't make love to me because the first time will hurt, and I remind him of an ex." I got up from the sofa and went to my bag and grabbed my phone. I was going to talk some sense into my delusional boyfriend because if he thinks I'm gonna put up with not being good enough, he's painfully mistaken.

"Woah! Wait, what are you doing? You're not going to call him are you?" Sebastian questioned.

"Of course I'm gonna call him, this is all bullshit! If he wants a virginal human to be by his side then he needs to visit a nunnery. Otherwise he's gonna need to grow a pair and get over it. Every body has a few horribly depressing moments in their past but it's still the past. You don't see me crying over the catalogue freaks in this town judging me." I was waiting for Alexander to pick up but it went to voicemail. I looked at the time on my clock and saw it was only 9pm. "He won't pick up, I'm going back over there…"

"NO! Raven don't tell him about this it's just gonna make him put his walls back up. Not to mention he'll be pissed off at me for telling you. I kinda broke a Bro-Code… not cool. But I couldn't leave you hating yourself either. It's not you Raven. He's been with other girls after, but he swore off gypsies and virgins. So don't feel so bad. Maybe I can talk some sense into him to help him move on. We'll never mention what I told you, only about what happened tonight at the mansion. OK?" Sebastian tried to reason with me. I just cried and felt my chin quiver. He pulled me into a hug and swayed me a bit to calm me down. When I got the sobs under control, I felt him press a kiss to my temple, then again between my brows. I sighed and sniffed. Sebastian lifted my face with a finger under my chin to take in my flushed face. I looked him in the eyes and felt completely at ease.

"Thank you, Sebastian," I told him before pressing a kiss to his cheek. "You're a good frien-" I got cut-off by his lips gently pressing against mine. I was tense and surprised so I didn't respond. But he kept moving his lips over mine before caressing my cheeks with his thumbs. I don't know why, but I started to kiss him back. He slowly encouraged me to continue so I wouldn't get frightened away, and it worked. I held onto his shoulders to pull myself closer, and for balance. Sebastian continued to stroke my cheek with one hand and gradually moved the other down to circle my waist. At the same time I felt the wet tip of his tongue gliding across the seam of my lips, so I granted him entrance. Sebastian accepted it and deepened the kiss while pulling me tighter against him. His hand that caressed my face was now lost in my hair as his palm held me still and his fingers massaged my scalp. I felt goosebumps breaking out all over me and I moaned from the pleasure. Sebastian broke our kiss to place open mouth kisses along the side of my neck at the sensitive and tender spots. I continued to moan and pant. He walked me back to the couch, and I was still in a daze when we collapsed onto it with him on top of me.

Sebastian was rubbing his big hands along my sides. One of his legs was between mine and one of mine was between his. His kisses returned to my lips and I was lost in the heat of the moment. I wrapped my arms around him and rubbed his back with one hand and fisting his blonde dreads with the other. I pulled him closer to me and urged him to continue. Suddenly, he tensed up and stopped. Quickly he pulled himself off of me and adjusted his clothing. Like a cool class of water splashing me in the face, I was pulled from my trance. Again, in one night, I felt exposed, ashamed, rejected, frustrated and alone. "Raven," he started. But I couldn't take it anymore.

"Don't. Please, Sebastian, just… don't say anything, please. I… I need to go. Um, thanks for the pizza." As quickly and with as much dignity as I could I fixed my clothes and grabbed my overnight bag. I let myself out and practically ran down the stairs only to bump into someone.

"Raven?" I felt myself pale at the voice. "What are you doing here?"

"Alexander…" I looked up to see him looking confused and surprised. "Um, I was just leaving." I moved to go around him but he blocked my attempt.

"What are you doing here?" he asked again with more emphasis.

"You kicked me out remember?" I answered bitterly. "Sebastian apologized for earlier and offered me pizza. Are you gonna let me go now?" I said harshly. Alexander looked taken aback at my tone. But I didn't stick around to wait for him to move. I shoved my way passed, grabbed my bike and left. I still didn't want to go home so I just rode around the town for a while. I heard my phone ring but decided not to answer it. As I rode around town, clearing my head, an idea came to mind. I'm already eighteen now and I have no desire to be around anybody right now. I need my own place.**  
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**A/N: thank you Sammysam13 for the inspiring review and quickly understanding where this was going XD. **

**Also, thank you Alpha Wolf Music Lover for responding to my crisis and the support. **

**As for all of you readers, thank you for reading and the support. Please don't forget to Review or send me a PM about your thoughts on the story positive and negative. My favorite responses are when my readers tell me exactly what they are expecting to see happen in the story. The same goes for all of my Vampire Kisses fanfictions (total of 4). So stay tuned for the next update. XD**


	3. Chapter 3

**Part 3**

_One week later._ Today I was officially moving into my new home. It's an apartment near the university that I'll be attending next month. It's also a mile out of Dullsville and a couple more before you reach Hipsterville. So I'm sort of in between the towns. My parents were supportive in me getting my own place so I let them help me out. My dad insisted on making payments for the first quarter of the year on my lease, which was a big help and helped me with the first payments of my first car. Then my mom took me shopping for household supplies, but was a little put off on my choice of décor. She does realize Goth isn't a phase, right?

My phone rang while I was loading boxes into my BMW. I checked the caller ID before answering and saw Becky's cheesy picture. "Hey, Becky what's up? Are you coming by?" I asked. She was supposed to come help me load boxes into her pickup so I wouldn't have to make double trips. I wanted to be out of here before nightfall.

"Sorry Raven, I know I'm late helping you move. Matt's car broke down and he needed a lift. We're on our way now."

"NO! Becky I don't want anyone else knowing where I live! Can't you like drop him off somewhere or something?" The last thing I needed was Matt mentioning where I'm living to Trevor, Sebastian or Alexander, or anybody else in this town. Only my parents know where I'll be, and Becky was supposed to come find out and keep it secret.

"Raven, he's my boyfriend! I'm not gonna dump him off somewhere!" She argued. Why does she have to be so frustratingly dense?

"And I'm supposed to be you best friend since third grade. I don't want anyone else to know where I live, can you respect that?"

"Matt won't say anything. Besides we tell each other everything." She tried to reason.

"Fine, just don't come at all. I mean what I said; I don't want anyone else to know. If you can't understand that then you don't need to know either. I'll see you around, Becky. Enjoy your boyfriend." I hung up.

I'll just need to come back tomorrow early for the rest of the stuff. But I needed to go, now! After saying goodbye to my parents and Billy-Boy, and reminding them to keep my address to themselves, I got in my car and drove to my new home. I was so paranoid that something bad would happen so I kept looking in the rearview mirror to see if anyone had followed me. Thankfully it was all clear. I unloaded my stuff into my apartment, which was on the fifth floor WITH an elevator that worked, then went back down to park my car in the residential parking garage. As soon as I was back inside my new home, the sun started to set and I breathed a sigh of relief. I made sure all the windows were closed and covered with my dark purple curtains, and my door and fire escape gate were locked. Again I breathed a sigh of relief. It's not that I was afraid of anything; I was just avoiding everyone, especially two vampires that wouldn't stop calling me every two hours of the night.

On cue, my cell-phone rang and the caller ID showed a picture of black roses. _Alexander._ I ignored it, and then it rang again. The caller ID changed to a picture of an electric guitar. _Sebastian. _This happened again repeatedly. With Becky, Matt, Alexander again, Sebastian again, Alexander again, and ended with Becky again. After the constant ringing ceased, I began putting my things away.

My apartment was small with one bedroom, one bathroom, a kitchenette, a little dining room and a cozy living room. I put away the black and pewter dishware and utensils. Mom already took care of the groceries and cookware. Then I put away my linens and products into the linen closet and bathroom. And lastly I put my clothes and shoes away inside the drawers and closet. I didn't want to put anything out in the open just yet because I wanted to paint first, so everything else stayed in the boxes. Everything else that I left at home was mostly school supplies for when class start, other decorative items, books and movies. My furniture doesn't arrive until another two days so I'll have to sleep on my blow up bed tonight and do the painting tomorrow. My stomach started to growl and I remembered that I hadn't eaten since breakfast, so I went in the kitchen to put something together when my phone rang again. I then remembered that I had promised to call my parents once I got settled and silently cursed myself before answering.

"Raven," CRAP! I forgot to check the caller ID. It was Alexander. We hadn't spoken for almost a week now and I didn't know what to say to him if we did.

"Alexander… hi," was all I could think of saying. What could I say? What did Sebastian say to him? "How are you tonight?" I added.

"I miss you, Raven." He said. I could here the sadness in his voice and felt a little bad for dodging him. But it couldn't be helped. "You haven't been answering my calls or returning my messages. I know you're upset about how thing went that night. But I didn't mean to hurt you or push you away. I want to be with you Raven. I love you! Please, come over. I need to hold you." I couldn't stop crying because I really did miss him. But I feel so guilty about kissing Sebastian.

"I miss you too, Alexander." I heard him breath a sigh of relief. "I'm sorry for avoiding you but you really made me feel like crap that night. I'm not going to let you think that I'll stay a virgin, because you're being irrational. Whatever reasons you have, you need to get over it and decide where this relationship is headed. Do you want to take the next step with me, or am I not good enough for that? I don't even care about the whole not turning me into a vampire part anymore. Onyx offered to do it after college for me anyways, but being with you is even more important to me. I don't want to rot away and die off, or be a virgin forever and never experience that kind of intimacy, have hot sex, mind-blowing orgasms, and yeah, a couple of kids in the future. So if you want that with me then… man up, Alexander! And if not, let me know now and you don't have to waste your time on me." Throughout my ranting I was able to make a decent pot of spaghetti to hold me over for the next three days.

Alexander was silent while I spoke and for a while after, so I had to check the phone to see if it was still on. Then I heard him clear his throat before speaking. "Raven, I do want… all of that, with you. You're right, I need to get over this, but I honestly don't think I could do it right now. Would it be so bad to wait a bit longer? Many people choose to wait until after they're married to have sex… and did you seriously just say 'mind-blowing orgasms'? What have you been up to all this time? Where are you now? Come over to the mansion and we'll talk, maybe go out to the cemetery."

"Are you seriously asking me to wait until you decide to marry me, _if_ you decide to marry me, in the unseen future that I can't be sure of? When was the last time you had sex, Alexander? I know you're not a virgin, I don't believe you would cheat on me, but I know that guys mostly think about sex and you obviously have those needs. So what's so wrong with it? I have needs too Alexander! No, I haven't had sex yet, but I do know how to masturbate, which is totally healthy by the way, so I've been very… needy lately, my batteries are dying, and doing it to myself isn't as efficient as it was years ago. I'm seriously not in the mood to be touched and kissed by you if I get left unsatisfied in the process. I want more. Kisses in the dark, cuddling in your coffin, and watching movies that get more action than I do is really starting to put a downer on my self-esteem. It seems that lately I've been a real bitch to everyone around me because of it. I don't like how I am right now, Alexander. I'm an adult now, we're about to start college soon, and… I'm really lonely. I need to know if you're ready to walk away from us, or move forward."

"We'll move forward, Raven. I promise you. I feel just the same and the thought of you masturbating is NOT helping me keep it together right now, so… you're right. Now tell me when can I see you. I need you, Raven. I need to be with you, now."

"I'm home."

"I was just at your house, Raven. Why won't you tell me the truth? Where are you?"

"I am telling you the truth, I'm home. I moved out and got my own place." I said innocently.

"WHAT? WH… WHEN? WHERE? Why didn't you tell me anything? Where are you staying? Nobody told me anything!" he yelled.

"Well it's about time I got out on my own, and I don't want to really live with anyone… especially if they're gonna kick me out. I decided that night that I wanted to move out. My parents supported it and helped me get settled, and I even got a car. My dad helped me out with paying for all of the down payments and my first couple of months, and mom helped with my shopping. Becky was supposed to help me move but refused to keep it secret from Matt so I'm not telling her along with everyone else where I am for now. I kinda want some peace from Dullsville, especially anyone trying to make surprise visits or pranks. And lastly, I didn't tell you because I was still… am still mad about… you know."

"So you're not going to tell me where you live? Isn't that going against my rights as your boyfriend? How long am I going to be in the dog house before I get invited over?"

"You're in a mansion, a far cry from a dog house." I retorted.

"You know what I mean," he responded.

"If you promise not tell _anyone_, and make sure you're not followed, I'll let you come by and help me decide on paint options…" I offered… more like waved a treat in front of my batty lover.

"Of course! Give me the address." I told him and we hung up. I ate my food and got ready to make my blow up bed. When I was done and ready to take a quick shower my phone rang. Thinking it was Alexander, I answered right away. It wasn't Alexander… it was Sebastian.

**A/N: thank you Sammysam13 for the correction XP**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N WARNING: EXPLICIT CONTENT... aka lemons XP This is the chapter that has now forced me to change the ratings to M for mature. This could be considered the last chapter. So let me know if you think I should make a Sequel, a Part 5, or just let it end. Read and Review. XD **

**Part 4**

"Raven? Where have you been? Are you okay?" Sebastian rushed through the phone.

"I'm fine, really. I'm sorry about avoiding you and for the other night, um, can we just forget that it happened? Alexander and I just made up and I don't want things to be awkward." I saw someone's car going into the parking lot downstairs and figured it was Alexander.

"So… you guys made up huh? That's great. I'm sorry about what happened too, especially since I started it, I shouldn't have taken advantage of you like that. Can you forgive me?" he apologized reluctantly. Why did he have to sound so reluctant? Was he expecting something more to come out of it?

"I forgive you, and thanks for stopping before it got any further. Look, can we just put it behind us and not mention it again? Alexander's coming by and I want things to work out between us." Why do I feel so sneaky right now? There was a knock at my door. Alexander.

"Yeah, that sounds great. I'll see you around Rae." He said.

"Okay, see you." Then I hung up and opened the door. Alexander stood like a dark dream come true in all his black and metal glory. When he looked into my eyes, I felt like I was pulled out of reality as everything else but him faded into nonexistence. "Alexander," I breathed.

He towered over me and stepped forward so I had to crane my neck to look up at him. As I did, I also reached up with both hands to lock behind his neck, and he leaned down to pull me closer to him. We kissed longingly, and I pulled him in before kicking my door closed. Alexander lifted me and turned so my back was against the door and my legs were wrapped around his waist. I raked my fingers through his hair and clawed at his back so he knew I wasn't gonna play nice. He groaned and thrust his bulge suggestively against my center. The intense jolt of pleasure from the friction made me moan, loud. I was shocked at myself but more so at Alexander. Maybe my talk finally got through to him. I pulled at his shirt, which made me so much more frustrated because I wanted contact, skin-to-skin contact.

"Wait," I told him. He stopped and set me down.

"Do you want to stop?" he panted the question. I felt better knowing he was just as affected as I was.

"Yes, NO… no I don't want to stop but… I was planning to shower since it's been a long busy day and I have pasta on my shirt. So um, just let me get cleaned up. Make yourself comfortable," then taking a look at my empty space, I added, "If you can. I have a blow up bed in the room." Turning he looked around.

"When are you getting your furniture?" he asked.

"The truck should be here in two more days, so I want to paint before then." Then I went to the kitchen and he followed. I grabbed the paint options and my pictures of the furniture I bought. "Here, while I'm in the shower you can look at these and help me come up with something, I wrote the themes on the pictures so you know what I was going for. But you know what I like so I trust your opinion. I'll be back." With that I left him there to keep occupied while I went to freshen up. I grabbed a fluffy blood red towel and went into the bathroom and started the shower. I washed my hair and cleaned myself with my roses and cinnamon scented body wash. When I was done, I wrapped myself up in the towel and brushed my teeth and then my hair. I thought about putting on pajamas but decided to do something more daring. I had a very thin, silky, dark red robe and nothing else. I tied it loosely around me so it was open and showed enough of my breast without showing the nipples, as well as expose my thigh as I walked.

"Raven, these ideas are really great, do you think I could paint…" Alexander was gaping as he finally noticed me leaning against the wall. As he stared, I walked over to him and hooked a finger under his chin to close his mouth so he wouldn't start drooling. Then I untied the sash and stepped back so he could see me. And he did.

"My ideas are great, aren't they, maybe you could come in the room and tell me what you think." I spoke casually like there was nothing-noticeable going on in his pants. "My bed is going to be a queen-size canopy and I need your advice on paint color, come on I'll show you." He still hasn't said anything, so I grabbed his hand to pull him towards the room. Let's see him resist me now. Thankfully he got up and started to rub his hands up my arms but I pulled a way. I turned around to go into the room and shrugged off my robe on the way. It fluttered to the floor and I heard Alexander groan. I couldn't stop the rush of butterflies fluttering in my stomach, I was so nervous. But I was also ready, more than ready even. I wanted to make love to the vampire of my dreams, the love of my life. I walked to the center of the room and turned to face him. For the first time since I came out the shower, he looked into my eyes. I knew that he saw in me the same thing I was seeing in him; unadulterated lust, and pure hunger… "Take me, Alexander," I breathed. "Now."

In a rush of vampire speed, Alexander stood a breath away from me. I gasped in surprise and excitement. Alexander seemed to be hesitating and I was starting to lose my confidence. "Raven, I want to make love to you, but I think I'll end being too rough with you. You're so, so much more beautiful that I've imagined. I can't be gentle right now with you. I need a minute, ok?" I honestly don't know what the hell is going on in that thick immortal head of his. All I could do was blink and grit my teeth. Ever so slowly Alexander backed out of the room like I was gonna stab him in the back or something… which did not seem like a bad idea at the moment. I stood there for some time, confused, until I heard voices coming from the living room.

"WHAT THE HELL!" I rushed to the front of the apartment to see Sebastian and Alexander talking in the middle of the living room. When they looked up I got a feeling of déjà vu as Sebastian blushed pink and looked away, while Alexander's eyes glowed red as he stared… also blushing. Yeah, I was still naked, and my boyfriend was now pissing me off. "Why is Sebastian here, Alexander, now, and after I told you I didn't want anyone else to know where I was?" I yelled.

"Raven I need him here in case… in case I lose control. For your first time… you're going to bleed." He tried to explain. "Can you wait in the room or cover up?"

"No!" I said defiantly. Sebastian turned so his back was to me, and Alexander looked shocked. "As a matter of fact, let's play a game since you're having a blast playing with my heart." He looked confused and I knew what I was about to do was going to hurt him. i couldn't stop myself even though my mind was telling me to stop. I walked over to face Sebastian, who then looked shocked as well. He looked from me, to Alexander, and honestly didn't know what to do. I could sense that he was thinking of moving a way, but I grabbed his hand, put it between my legs, and kissed his lips. The atmosphere seemed to be a dark mass of rage coming from Alexander.

"Sebastian… step away from her," Alexander warned in a low and shaky voice. I hated myself for going this far, but I hated feeling rejected while I stood completely open and vulnerable. I started moving against his hand so his finger caressed my flesh, then I darted my tongue pass his lips and moaned when he responded. Somehow it seemed like Sebastian was in a trance and I felt his fingers move to caress me. Then suddenly, everything stopped and I heard a loud crash. Sebastian was no longer in front of me but clear across the room with Alexander's hands squeezing his throat. My eyes widened and I ran over to them.

"Stop! Alexander stop it, let him go!" I yelled but Alexander wouldn't listen, only bare his fangs that seem to have elongated. I tried to get between them and push him off, but Sebastian's arm gently blocked me from doing that. He was letting Alexander hurt him. I looked at Alexander and did the first thing that came to mind. I slapped him hard. He let go of Sebastian and grabbed me by the arm, hard, and nearly dragged me to my room before slamming the bedroom door. When he let go of my arm I cradled it to my breast. Alexander didn't say anything. He just stalked towards me. I had so much adrenaline pumping through me that I honestly couldn't tell you what I was feeling. I glared at him with his eyes burning back at me. Unexpectedly, I felt myself being thrown down onto my blow up mattress. Alexander came up behind me so I tried to lift myself up, but was forced back down as he grabbed hold of my ankles and dragged me to the edge. And without warning, he took me without pause.

I felt the burning pain of the intrusion, but didn't have time to react. A scream was stuck, lodged in my throat. Alexander didn't pause or stop, he kept moving in and out of me with angry thrusts. I could feel and hear my arse cheeks slapping against his abdomen. His hands were gripping each cheek and I could feel his nails digging into my flesh. Everything was painful. But then… it changed. The pain became… I don't know what, but I wanted more. I wanted to feel him deeper, harder even. I felt him inside of me in ways I couldn't before imagine. I moaned and pressed against him more, arching my back more, rocking against him. my moans became shouts as he understood what I wanted and took me more violently. I felt something powerful building in me. I actually thought I was going to pee myself, and tried to hold it in by clenching.

Alexander groaned and fisted my hair to pull me up against him. I yelped but couldn't stop moving back against him. I panted and moaned as I tried to fight the feeling that was about to spill over me. Goose bumps broke out all over my body and I started to shiver as Alexander swiveled me around while I was still attached to him so that we were facing each other. He still wore his shirt and his pants were pushed down to his ankles. he held my both of my hands under me, crossing them, directly under my bottom. I watched him bang me in frenzy. The tension was building tighter, making my whole body flex until it became painful. My toes were curled and growing numb. I arched my back and screamed my release and felt the most amazing wave of pleasure that I could only describe as high-as-cloud-nine. I felt drugged or drunk or whatever it was I was feeling, it was… mind blowing. I was pulled back down to earth when I heard _a roar_. Alexander's body became so tense I was afraid he'd snap. And then a burst of hot gushing filled me at my core and Alexander collapsed on top of me. We were both out of breath and unable to move much less speak. So we lay here in together in silence, with nothing but our gasping breaths to fill the void. I could feel his heart pounding against my chest, almost hearing it. I felt it racing against my own beating heart.

I don't remember how much time has passed, but what I do remember was wrapping my arms and legs around Alexander and pulling him closer. I raked my fingers through his hair and massaged his head, before caressing his back beneath his shirt. Without words, Alexander, pushed himself up. I looked into his eyes and what I saw scared me. His eyes, his face, and the air around him were completely void of emotion. He was like a blank slate. I raised my hand to caress his face, but he casually moved it away with the back of his hand. He stood to adjust himself and pull up his pants. I suddenly felt cold and empty where he once was connected to me. After he fastened his belt, he quietly left the room not once looking at me.

I heard the front door close with a cold, quiet click. I sat up and looked down at myself, then got up to look in the mirror. I somehow felt different… a whole lot different, and it kinda scared me, so I wanted to see if I looked different. What I saw made me break down and cry. It was still I, but for some reason, I couldn't recognize myself. I got what I wanted, but now I feel like I lost everything. I felt like nothing. I felt like I was worth nothing. What the hell is wrong with me?


	5. Chapter 5

**Part 5**

The next day, I awoke with a soreness that made me aware of how intense last night was. I had no desire to speak to anybody about anything. So I got out of bed and stiffly walked to my bathroom to prepare a bath to soak in. When it was ready, I climbed in and was relieved with how the hot water soothed my aching muscles and swollen flesh. I noticed a deep purple and blue bruise had formed on my arm where Alexander had grabbed me. Then I looked between my legs and noticed similar bruises. I assured myself that he did not rape me, because it was what I wanted. He warned me, that he couldn't be gentle and I ended up provoking him to completely lose control.

Thoughts of how I had hurt him last night, and the way I used Sebastian to do it would haunt me for many days to come. All day I spoke to no one, refused all phone calls. Not one of them had come from the two vampires that I'd hurt last night. I was disgusted with myself. Eventually I forced myself out of the apartment and drove into town to pick up my paint and the rest of my boxes. I avoided whomever I could, but did leave a note for my parents assuring them that I was okay and would call soon. I went home, cleaned up a bit, and started painting. My kitchen was painted a dark gray that matched the granite counters, as well as my little dining area. The bathroom was a deep violet to compliment the lavender, white, and grey tiles. My bedroom was painted black on the wall where the bed would go, and crimson on the other walls. I went into the living room where the walls were bare and realized I hadn't decided how to paint it. The only colors of paint I had were dark gray, deep violet, charcoal black, and crimson. So I left them all in the center of the living room on the plastic covering the floor until I could think of what to do with it. By the time I was done it was already getting dark outside. I opened the windows to let the fumes out as well as help dry the paint faster. My stomach growled and I realized that I hadn't eaten all day. Then again, I hadn't been able to. My phone buzzed and I realized it was a text and checked to see whom it was.

**Alexander: **do u still need help painting?

I text him back after a few minutes of thinking whether or not it was a good idea. I didn't know what to say about the night before but then again, if he doesn't mention it, then I wouldn't have to either. Alexander only asked about painting.

**Raven:** yea, I tried to get it done today, but I'll have to go over it a 2nd time, and the living room is still white. I really don't want white ceilings either -_-

**Alexander: **ok I'm coming by.

**Raven:** ok thanx

I was still unsure if it was a good idea, but I did need help painting before the furniture came tomorrow. I decided not to say anything except respond to whatever he wanted to talk about. If he didn't want to talk about it, then I didn't want to be the one to bring it up. Deep down, I was scared. I didn't know if he'd break up with me for messing around with his best friend and hurting him, provoking him. All I could do was wait and see. I went around the apartment to check on how the paint was drying and when I got to the bathroom, I looked into the mirror at my reflection. I had on a thin black tank with 'Bite Me' across the breast, and red spandex shorts. My long black hair was in a messy bun and I was covered in paint smudges and splatter. My eyeliner looked thicker than usual from smudges, and my eyes were looking red from crying last night. I heard the doorbell and resolved that I had no time to freshen up, so I went to answer it. When I opened the door, Alexander stood with his backpack. Neither of us could look directly at one another nor even say 'hi'. I simply stepped back to let him in and then closed the door behind him. I stood to the side, as he looked at the walls and walked around the apartment. Thinking about how he saw it made me realize that I probably did a crappy job. But he didn't say anything, just put his bag down on the kitchen counter, picked up the paint roller and got to work starting with the second coat on the kitchen and dining room walls. I picked up the second roller when my phone started to ring. I didn't care who was calling. I didn't want to talk. So I turned off my phone. Alexander noticed but didn't say anything. Again, my stomach started growling.

"Have you eaten anything?" he asked quietly.

"No… you?" I asked nervously.

"No… Should we order something?" he suggested.

"Sure, but I don't know what's closer to here yet. Um… there is a burger joint nearby. I could go get us something, while you paint… if you want." I suggested.

I heard Alexander clear his throat before he spoke. "Yeah, okay." I put my roller down, grabbed my purse and keys, and stepped into my monster boots. I didn't say anything else as I was leaving, and neither did he. I went down to the residential parking garage and got in my car. As soon as I closed the door I sighed from the pent up tension. The air in the apartment was so thick and full of unsaid words, I don't know how long this was going to last. I drove out to the burger joint and notices some of the stores in my area. There wasn't a lot out here, but I did pick out some places I'd be able to stop by for stuff. The burger joint looked more like a biker bar with all the motorcycles lined up in rows outside and some bikers were smoking. I parked my car near the road and started walking to get our food. As I walked pass the people outside, I got some wolf whistles, and suggestive comments that I refused to pay any attention to. When I went inside I was surprised to realize that the place really must be a biker bar rather than a burger joint. Whatever, as long as they sold food I was fine.

"How can I help you, honey?" a woman behind the bar asked me. She looked like Sandy from Grease with breast implants and tattoos on each one. I smiled, I think I'm gonna love this place.

"What do you have on the menu?" I asked kindly.

"For tonight, let's see," then she counted off on her fingers, "We've got steaks with sides, burgers with fries or onion rings, nachos, and chili. So what would you like, hon?"

"Great, can I get the steaks, rare, with sides, and a cheese burger with onion rings, please?"

"What kind of sides would you prefer, rice, mashed potatoes, garlic bread, and corn. You've got two choice or pay for extra."

"Mashed potatoes and corn sound good. Thanks."

"No problem, honey, comin' right up." Then she left for a bit and came back. "Do you want anything to drink with that?" I ordered some sodas and paid the bill while I waited for the food to be ready. "I haven't seen you around here b'fore, what brings you by, if you don't mind me askin'." She seemed really friendly and it was a relief considering all the tension I'd be returning to.

"I just moved to the area and my boyfriend is helping me paint. Neither of us ate dinner so I remembered seeing this place a couple of times. I grew up in the town nearby so I'm trying to be more familiar with the new surroundings." I explained.

"Oh, so then I'll be seeing you around more often I hope! I'm Moira, by the way." She reached her hand over the counter and I took it in return and smiled wider. I just made a new friend.

"I'm Raven, and yes, you'll be seeing me around." She smiled too and gave me my order.

"Glad to hear it, and I'll let these guys know you're not to be messed with." She winked at me and added, "Since you're locale now, we ladies need to stick together." I thanked her and nodded in agreement. We said 'bye' and 'take care' and I got back in my car and drove off. It was really starting to sink in that I'm finally living on my own. Maybe I'll stop working at the Traveling Agency with Ruby and find a job near here. Once I got my class schedule, I'll see what hours I could spend working. After I parked my car, grabbed the bags, and went into the elevator, I thought about what was going to happen with Alexander and I. I want to be with him, but I'm kinda confused on how I feel about Sebastian. Both must obviously be upset with me. I was really selfish and stupid. Alexander must be disgusted with me at how desperate for sex I was acting. Was it really that big of a deal? Couldn't I have just been happy to be loved and let everything happen at its own pace, instead of trying to force it?

I opened my apartment door and saw the gray walls finished. I closed the door and put the food, along with my purse and keys, on the counter and went to find Alexander. He wasn't in the bathroom, but the second coat of paint was done in there. So I went into the bedroom and found him looking at the walls. "I'm back," I told him. he turned around and looked at me. I couldn't look him in the eye so I glanced away and noticed the walls were already done too. "Wow, you work fast. Thanks." He didn't say anything but just kept looking at me. I didn't know if he wanted to say something or if he expected me to say something. "Um… I got you rare steaks with corn and mashed potatoes. I hope that's okay. The place actually wasn't a burger joint… more like a biker joint." Then I laughed nervously. "Definitely a place I could see Phoenix in." Another nervous laugh. I gulped and started shuffling my feet before chancing a glance at Alexander. He had this look on his face like he was trying to figure something out. "Do you want to talk about…"

"No," he answered in a raspy voice.

"Are you going to break up with me?" I whispered knowing he'd still here me.

"Do you want me to?"

"No… but, if you're just going to hate me… for last night… then I'd understand. I'm… a horrible girlfriend. I was stupid, selfish, and wrong. And I am so, so sorry for what I did, and for hitting you, and provoking you. You have always been good to me, and you didn't deserve the way I treated you." I looked Alexander in the eye so he'd know I was telling the truth. I felt really guilty about last night.

"Let's go eat," he said. He walk pass me and out of the room. I followed him into the kitchen. He leaned against the counter with his arms folded over his chest. I pulled the food and drinks from the bag and grabbed utensils from the drawer. I past Alexander what was his and we started eating on the counter top. "Thanks." He said referring to the food.

"I can't make you paint on an empty stomach." I tried to ease the tension but it was still there.

"What do you want for the living room?" he asked after a while. I thought about it and pulled out the pictures of the living room furniture. It was a set so I just needed to make it match, I guess. I showed it to him and he took it.

"I honestly don't know. The set is a mix of modern and antique so… maybe… I don't know. What do you think?"

"This is the only room you didn't have a theme for. But the furniture does make look modern Victorian. I'll come up with something for you if you like." He offered.

"Yeah, thanks." I reached for some napkins when suddenly Alexander stopped me. I looked at him and saw he was shocked as he examined my arm. I looked at it and saw the bruises from his grasp last night; four purple stripes on my forearm. I honestly forgot about it. "It's fine Alexander, don't worry about it."

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have grabbed you like that. You're only human, I should have…"

"No, Alexander, you can't blame yourself for being upset. I _did_ slap you _while_ you were already enraged… which I also provoked. I'm the one at fault. And… it… well…" Now I was all flustered and blushing. I looked up at him and regretted it because it only made me more embarrassed and ashamed of myself. "That whole… dominating mad-man thing _was_ kind of a turn-on." I whispered. Then I looked away and started drinking my coke to cool my nerves. Alexander was silent and still holding my arm, but gently stroking it with his thumb. So maybe he wasn't totally hating me.

"I was too rough with you, Raven. You deserved better for your first time…"

"My first time was perfect, Alexander," I said absent-mindedly. I gasped at what I just said. "I mean, we could have been under better circumstances, but the actual… first time… was really perfect." I chanced a look at him to see what he thought, and his eyes were wide in disbelief.

"You don't need to make excuses for how I treated you, Raven."

"I'm not. I knew it would hurt the first time, but… I wanted it. The pain turned into something… indescribable, but… but I wanted more of it. I wanted the pain and the pleasure combined. It was amazing and… really hot. Um, now I totally understand what 'hot sex' and 'mind-blowing orgasms' are. So, please don't make it sound anything less. Besides, it was with you. I love you and I've only wanted you, so… it was perfect. I don't know what I was thinking before, but even though I'm sorry I did it, I'm kinda glad I got a reaction out of you. I felt completely vulnerable and rejected with how you kept putting me aside so easily while I literally bared myself to seduce you. But that's no excuse, I shouldn't have played with you that way, especially with your friend… it was cruel."

I looked again at Alexander because he was so quiet. He had his eyes closed and arms folded again. His jaw was set and I could see the frustration etched in his face. "You're going to break up with me, Alexander, aren't you?" I asked.

"I don't know… Raven, I think I might." He rasped. My chest started to feel sore and heavy, like a boulder was sitting on my heart, crushing it. I felt my breath leave me and a knot in my throat. Alexander came to me and wrapped be in his arms. I tried to hold on to his shoulders but my fists were clenched tight and shaky. Tears flowed from my eyes and Alexander held me tighter. "I'm sorry, Raven," I shook my head to let know he shouldn't be sorry. But I couldn't speak. "I want to break up." I let out a sob after those words and wrapped my arms around his neck and cried. Alexander held me close. I felt him take a step moving me backwards, so I took a step back, still not letting him go. He kept going and had eventually led me into the bedroom. "But first let me show you what it should have been like…"**  
**

**A/N: Okay readers, I decided part five was needed. Please don't forget to review and tell me what you think!**

**Tell me if i should continue, let it end, or what? If you want it continued, then feed me some ideas... you know? Food for Thought XD I can totally go on, but I need to know what the readers want so I can deliver. Feel free to PM me as well.**


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